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the toilet paper of life

2/25/2012

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it's the end of the roll. 
are you going to change it?

yep, that's my question. 

after living in the miracle of last summer in my life, after awakening to the truth of my lack of surrender and finally surrendering, after basking in the relaxation and the "warmth" (for lack of a better word) that is His presence,  i've reached a new "end of myself" with Him.  it differs tremendously  from the painful experience of last summer's initial surrender.  this one feels more matter of fact and less emotional - there's no other choice but to change it.  and while it's not a comfortable change, it is something i want to do.

have you reached a point in your life when you said to yourself, "it's do or die."  you felt the pressing of the Spirit, perhaps the conviction or the questioning, the true reflecting of your life which requires change.  you have left the sermon, the quiet time, the recently read book, or an intense conversation challenged to change.  you sensed the unsettling in your soul that kept you awake at night and greeted you again in the morning.  although, in the morning the greeting is quieter.  and given a couple days you can silence it all together.

with the passage of time and the distractions of life, what at one time felt like a "must" starts to feel like maybe a passing idea and eventually is forgotten all together.

i fear that with the current stirrings in my heart...   that's why i am wholeheartedly pursing the path less traveled in my life.  i'm changing the roll because i don't ever want to be satisfied with something less than full.

full life.  abundant life.  do you have it?  it's not only a truth for eternity beyond this experience in the world, it's for now.  it's worth the change.  it's worth the surrender.  truly experiencing Him and genuinely knowing Him is worth the commitment and risk of doing what is now's "must".  don't delay and miss the "must" that pulls you into the abundance that Christ promised.  hold me accountable in the same; i beg you.

I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. John 10:10
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